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A Great Theory On Hell

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  #1  
Old 04-19-2005, 04:22 PM
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Default A Great Theory On Hell

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question:

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, " and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"
 
  #2  
Old 04-20-2005, 10:01 PM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

very nice...
 
  #3  
Old 04-21-2005, 03:57 PM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

I LOVE this "story" that took some serious thinking.

~Amanda
 
  #4  
Old 04-22-2005, 03:10 AM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

A very hot story by any means...Been there and Done that as the saying goes...
I like the anology also myself...

WheelBrokerAng
 
  #5  
Old 04-22-2005, 02:49 PM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

Yeah, a friend sent me that in an email awhile back. Funny as *hell*
 
  #6  
Old 04-22-2005, 02:57 PM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

its kind of like the psychology exam, where the students had to take one human characteristic, and describe it, such as:

what is bravery
what is pride
what is ignorance

so forth...someone chose pride..so the paper looked like this..

-------------------------------
Patrick
April 22, 2005
Psych 101


What is Pride"

This is.
---------------------------

and handed it in.
 
  #7  
Old 04-22-2005, 09:16 PM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

LMAO!! That's so funny Patrick!! LMAO!!

~Amanda
 
  #8  
Old 05-08-2005, 10:54 PM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

haha...this is a good theory...i wish hell would freeze over because alot of people would owe me!!
 
  #9  
Old 05-09-2005, 06:36 PM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

wow, i hear that one! i dont know how many people have told me that...
 
  #10  
Old 05-10-2005, 02:34 PM
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Default RE: A Great Theory On Hell

im sure there have been some ladies who would have to pay up too...
 


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